Tuesday, August 23, 2011


My 39th birthday is in just a couple of days, and while the thought of being a mere year away from 40 is not particularly disturbing, it is a little freaking weird.

Because I am clearly not old enough to be 40. Or 39, for that matter.

While I say I'm not affected by the number, I am doing things that show evidence to the contrary. Casually inquiring about the cost of Botox. Using more Ben Gay than normal. Growing hair from my chin. There are some things that  I can not control. Then there are the things that I can. To that end, I've made a list of 39 things I'd like to do while I'm 39.

1. Say "I'm with the band." and have it be true.
2. Purchase new bath towels. Nice ones. I am too old to be using shitty towels.
3. Get paid to write something. Done! Thanks, BlogHer, for syndication.
4. Go on an overnight trip with my husband, without the kids.
5. Learn how to drive a stick shift. That's embarrassing.
6. Yell "And the horse you rode in on!" at someone in a fit of rage.
7. Take a golf lesson.
8. Read "Gone With the Wind" instead of just claiming to have read it.
9. Get diapers out of my house FOREVER.
10. Go camping with my family. Apparently, the Husband thinks it's a good way to 'make memories' and 'bond as a family'. I originally typed 'bong as a family', which sounds like a lot more fun.
11. Catch up on the kids' baby books. This may be the most unrealistic item on the list.
12. Put pictures in all the frames around the house that don't have pictures in them or, worse, have the pictures that came with the frames.
13. Keep up with current events. On a Weekly Reader level, at minimum.
14. Sort through/get rid of all the boxes of toys, books and dolls from my childhood, that I have been moving around (in the same boxes) for the past 20 years. Done!
15. Beat my high score on Tetris.
16. Find something new to do with chicken.
17. Redecorate my bedroom. Or at least hang a picture on the wall. We've only been in this house 8 years, it's time I got to it.
18. Get a celebrity to retweet me.
19.Write letters to the teachers who made a difference in my life, thanking them.
20. Make a better effort to stay in contact with my brothers.
21. Teach Julia to ride a bike without training wheels.
22. Paint my laundry room a ridiculously bright color so my brain will be tricked into thinking laundry is 'fun!'.
23. Throw more dinner parties.
24. Make coq au vin.
25. Learn all the words to Northfield: The Disaster.
26. Spend more one on one time with my kids.
27. Sleep through the night, at least once.
28. Become a "Blog of Note" on blogger.com. Make it so!
29. Drink less Coke. Done!
30. Drink more beer. Done, really well.
31. Make jam, can it and give it as Christmas gifts in an effort to be thrifty. End up spending more on supplies, jars, cute ribbons and labels than I would have spent on a regular gift that didn't take me 4 days to make.
32. Start a fire using only a magnifying glass to harness the power of the sun.
33. Find out exactly how many mini-marshmallows I can fit in my mouth at once. Done!
34. Make something crafty and useful. Instead of just seeing something and thinking "Oh, I could make that!" and then going out and buying it.
35. Plan a huge benefit gala for charity. Done!
36. Fight for my right to party.
37. Have a family portrait made. The last family picture we have features only one child. Done!
38. Be less sensitive to criticism.
39. Play more. Work less.

Some of them are hard. Some of them, not so much. But I'm going to give them all a try, and I'll keep you updated over the next year. Wish me luck!


  1. Thirty-nine and fabulous, just sayin' . . .

  2. There are quite a few of those I could help you with. Especially #5 & #30. For grins and giggles we could do it at the same time.

    And as a side note.. you have a lot to look forward to.. I LOVED turning 40.. I felt a new sense of freedom as the lady who earned her right to tell it like it is and not be considered a bitch. Of course, now they just think I'm crazy, but they leave me alone.

  3. 28. Go to your feedburner account (http://feedburner.google.com) and set it up to automatically tweet when you post with (CC: @blogger) or something mentioning @blogger (I made it blarged @blogger when I did it) added to the end of every tweet. It only took me about 2 weeks of doing this before they finally got fed up and featured me. Or maybe they realized immediately how awesome I was and had a list they had to get through first... but your blogs are all awesome and they will listen if you forward all of your blogs to them on twitter. DO IT!

    And I want jam for Christmas (or Hanukkah), just sayin.

  4. Thank you, Wendy. :)
    Kristen, I will hold you to it.
    JRose, you are devious and brilliant and well deserving of jam.

  5. I would like to be around to see you finish the list......you've got a pretty good start on a lot of these things, my darling daughter. So I'll give you nineteen years to finish it! That's how old I was thirty nine years ago this Thursday....
    I can help you on #4....and I think one night a month you and should set on my patio and drink beer and listen to old records. That would take care of #30....but I am just a tad disappointed about #8 {:)

  6. I hope you're around when I finish the list, Mom, since it's stuff I want to do THIS YEAR. "Happy birthday, honey. I hope I'm not dead by your next one!" You are mean. :(

  7. Love Debby's post about hoping to be around for another year! Does getting trim paint and wall paint on your bedroom wall count as "redecorating"? Also....you would like Tosh to tweet you again? That would mean that he tweeted you once already. How have i missed this story?
    Happy BIrthday Kelly!

  8. Happy Birthday! 39 things to do and 366 (leap year gives you a bonus day) days to do it! Good luck. I would be happy to help with the beer drinking...we could do it over Skype. Love you!